Shoulda woulda coulda

I really enjoy discussing the idea of "ignorance is bliss" as lively conversations will generally ensue.  I for one agree with the statement.  Living a life of ignorance could really result in bliss.  If you are completely unaware then nothing can really affect you right?

Now while I agree I don't subscribe to it myself.  I like knowing, learning, asking - sounds like my profile, check - and generally being aware. According to Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs self-actualization can only happen once all the other needs are met.  Those who live in that blissful place never really get to the top.  Yeah they may excel at things but is there a passion or a need driving it or just the ignorance of going along for the ride/doing what one "should" do.

I truly do believe that you will never fully experience the good without the bad.  Which would in turn imply that those who never experience the bad will have a hard time appreciating the good.  This isn't to say that these people won't be happy, I'm sure they will be, but they will be existing on a surface level.  A level of no awareness, no introspection, no desire for understanding.  Like functioning on auto-pilot.  Sure the plane can fly but what happens when it comes time to land or an evasive maneuver is required?  In a sense you would be "flying in the dark".

All of this brings me to the point of what we "should" be doing or the feelings of failure that can occur when we are living up to expectations other than our own.  I myself realize that I am not where I thought I would be at my age, but then again how could I have really known?  So many things will take place in our lives that will forever change our paths.  Do we struggle to fight against them and realign ourselves with the "should"?  Or do we embrace them and use them as a tool to move forward?  To become better than our previous "should".  Besides where does this "should" come from?

The "shoulds come from society, our friends, our parents and our environments.  The fact that I am 29 will generally elicit a "should be in a relationship".  But I'm not.  And of course there are times where I feel sad and alone but at the same time I am actually quite content with it all.  I should be in my career right now.  I'm trying I really am and I may just get there (with my upcoming interview) but it took me a while to find my path.  And during that time I got to have a "once in a lifetime" opportunity working for the Olympic Games.  I would not trade that for anything in the world.  Yet I know that in the minds of some I'm not doing what I "should" be doing.

We shouldn't allow ourselves to become slaves to the expectations that other have of themselves.  We should be striving towards achieving happiness in our own lives.  Not necessarily forcing yourself to be happy with just the things you have.  But finding the things that make US happy.  Happiness is different things to different people so why do we try to achieve the things that make others happy?