How are you feeling?

It's interesting how many of us complain or talk about things that are "bothering" us without actually knowing what is really the "bother".  It can be so difficult to properly express what it is we're feeling as it can be difficult to even sort out what those feelings are.  My brain hurts even thinking about all the ways our feelings can be interpreted.

When someone says they are upset what does that really mean?  It could be a myriad of things... Sad, confused, frustrated, angry... the list goes on.  Should we know how to sort out what those emotions are aside from "upset"?  Or should upset be enough?  I don't think it is. 

Many of us find ourselves analyzing things that happen to try and understand the situation but how often do we turn that analysis to how we are feeling about the situation.  A lot of the time the initial description we use to describe how we feel isn't necessarily the case.  Take for example: You meet someone new after being single for awhile and things are going great.  Then one night something is said and it doesn't go over very well.  Many people will describe themselves as feeling "upset"... so as I asked before what does "upset" mean?  Are your sad because what they said hurt your feelings?  Are you angry because boundaries were crossed?  Are you frustrated because you're not feeling heard?  Are you confused because what you believed isn't the case?  All of those things could be happening to you at the same time and since they can all feel or become overwhelming we say we are "upset".  We are - but I think there is more to it.

If you find yourself upset because you are overwhelmed by a jumble of emotions it only stands to reason that if you can sort out WHAT you are feeling you can find a way to bring yourself back down.  If you can utilize the things that "fix" the individual feelings that make up "upset" it again stands to reason that you can tackle each one, one at a time.  Calming each overwhelming emotion will in turn make the next one easier to work with.  Also - forcing yourself to examine the details will put your brain into a more rational, logical state to function on the "high road" instead of the reactive emotional "low road".  A state where emotions aren't trying to describe how they are feeling... how can they... they're emotional?

Am I by default a couch potato?

Does the fact that I really enjoy TV and movies make me a boob tube couch potato?  I really really like getting wrapped up in a series in fact I stayed up until 3:30am last night watching Firefly.  The only reason I went to bed was because I knew I should in order to actually be awake during the day.  Did a similar thing when I first started watching Dexter, but I was working so it was 1am rather than nearly 4...

I may be getting off topic here... Ok back...  So yeah I'm a junkie when it comes to TV.  I do watch some incredibly bad shows but most of them are informational rather than trash - and then of course my nerd series... Maybe the problem is more that I have access to all the episodes instead of having to wait for each new episode.  Oh and the episodes have no commercials so it's easy to go from one to the other right away.  I've actually warned people when I've given them full seasons of Dexter and True Blood to be careful they don't stay up all night watching them and everyone has come back to me and said "Oh man I HAD to turn it off" :)

I'm currently burning Dr. Who season 2 (the episodes I have so far) and once I can properly transfer all of season 1, 2, 3, 4 and the specials I will be in a Dr. Who episode vortex for awhile...

My brain hurts cause I want to watch all these shows but I should really be applying for jobs...

I'm obsessed erm in love?

Oh god I think I may have gone a bit crazy...  Perhaps it's the too much time on my hands, or that I've been living in the land of the single for too long, or even the progression of my nerdness.  Hmmmm I'm guessing it's all three.  I've fallen in love become obsessed with Dr's.  Well one of them WAS a doctor in previous roles and the other is probably the most famous doctor at the moment (aside from perhaps MJ's).

So who am I talking about you ask?  Well the first one is a long time internet stalking focus crush and the second is a recent aquisition ladies and gentleman let me introduce you to Nathan Fillion and Matt Smith or Richard Castle and Dr. Who respectively. *side note that is Captain Hammer not Richard Castle*

Yeah I've been a little obsessed lately, watching interviews and old episodes of various series... I love the fact that I can follow Nathan Fillion on Twitter as well that is just damn cool when you are in love obsessed with a celebrity.

My brain hurts cause they ARE celebrities and not someone I could see on the street and it sucks... Think I'm going to watch some Dr. Who confidential to try and cheer myself up.  Maybe bring myself back to reality.

What is happiness to you?

My brain hurts today because I've been dealing with drama that should have been left behind in junior high... I'm nearly 30 and yet I have been dragged into nonsense created by someone else. Why? Well I only have speculations, speculations that I believe come from a place of awareness. Human behaviour intrigues me and well this behaviour is the most intriguing thus far. Well ok maybe not THE most but pretty close...

Why is it that people who are unhappy with themselves and their lives feel the need to bring down others. I just don't get it... Happiness is what we make out of any given situation... and if you aren't happy in your situation does taking down someone else all of a sudden change things? It doesn't, yet so many people in this world seem to think that it does.  In fact one of my favourite songs asks some questions about happiness I would like to ask a lot of people... for example; "If you're so goddamn perfect how come you're so far from a smile?"

If happiness is a state of mind does that mean those who have a hard time achieving happiness have a skewed state of mind? There are pills and psychiatrists for those states but what about those who cannot or refuse to acknowledge there may be problems? What happens then? Do the people in their lives just follow along and hope for the best? Do they try and help that person realize that there could be something wrong? Can someone look for help when they are blind to their problems?

I think that's the problem. If you are not aware of the things that you are bringing you down you cannot take the necessary steps to change it. And if you are so unaware of the things going on within yourself can anyone else help you? Doubtful...