How are you feeling?

It's interesting how many of us complain or talk about things that are "bothering" us without actually knowing what is really the "bother".  It can be so difficult to properly express what it is we're feeling as it can be difficult to even sort out what those feelings are.  My brain hurts even thinking about all the ways our feelings can be interpreted.

When someone says they are upset what does that really mean?  It could be a myriad of things... Sad, confused, frustrated, angry... the list goes on.  Should we know how to sort out what those emotions are aside from "upset"?  Or should upset be enough?  I don't think it is. 

Many of us find ourselves analyzing things that happen to try and understand the situation but how often do we turn that analysis to how we are feeling about the situation.  A lot of the time the initial description we use to describe how we feel isn't necessarily the case.  Take for example: You meet someone new after being single for awhile and things are going great.  Then one night something is said and it doesn't go over very well.  Many people will describe themselves as feeling "upset"... so as I asked before what does "upset" mean?  Are your sad because what they said hurt your feelings?  Are you angry because boundaries were crossed?  Are you frustrated because you're not feeling heard?  Are you confused because what you believed isn't the case?  All of those things could be happening to you at the same time and since they can all feel or become overwhelming we say we are "upset".  We are - but I think there is more to it.

If you find yourself upset because you are overwhelmed by a jumble of emotions it only stands to reason that if you can sort out WHAT you are feeling you can find a way to bring yourself back down.  If you can utilize the things that "fix" the individual feelings that make up "upset" it again stands to reason that you can tackle each one, one at a time.  Calming each overwhelming emotion will in turn make the next one easier to work with.  Also - forcing yourself to examine the details will put your brain into a more rational, logical state to function on the "high road" instead of the reactive emotional "low road".  A state where emotions aren't trying to describe how they are feeling... how can they... they're emotional?